New Year's anecdote
Family ring round a few companies and orders a Santa Claus.
Doorbell. Includes Santa Claus. Suddenly a shot - Santa Claus
falls. Behind him is a hired killer and asks: Grandfather
Frost ordered?
New Year in Ethiopia. Starving children gathered under a bush
waiting for Santa Claus. Santa Claus appears, congratulates the
children on a holiday and going to leave. - Grandfather Frost,
and gifts? - A gift only those who eat well.
Two of the homeless after the New Year holiday exchange
impressions: - New Year well met! Get out of the basement
I look at the landing bottle of vodka - 100 grams
unfinished, peered into the tank - a sandwich with caviar, just
once nadkusheno. Drank, ate, walked down the street. And how
are you? - Bad, all holiday homes sat: some bastard put the ice
rink at the door.
Telephone conversation with the New Year: - Hello, this
insurance company? Tell us, we can insure a house call? - No,
this is impossible. Now we will send a representative, and he
enter into an agreement with you. - Well, send. Only
hurry up, but then we already burning out tree and starts to
smoke carpet!
In Paris, a famous restaurant Maxim, is a New Year
show. In the smoke drunk NEW RUSSIAN beckons to the waiter and
asks: - Bro, you have frog legs? - Of course,
Monsieur! - Well, then quickly sprygay to the bar for a beer! ..
In the airplane passenger looks out the window and in fear
pozyvaet to his stewardess: - Have we strayed off course? - No,
what you it took? - But under our snow, taiga, and must be
Hawaii ... - Yes, no, everything is fine, just a new Russian
New Year celebrate ...
Comes as a man on the street, he sees: a woman sits in a
puddle. - Why are you sitting in a puddle? - Maybe I'm Snow
Maiden, and maybe I melted!
The family had two children - one a pessimist and the other
an optimist. Approaching New Year. Decided their parents' level
the "well to no such extremes have been, and prepared presents:
pessimist horse, but the optimist bunch of horse manure. In the
morning the children wake up ... Pessimist: - Hyyy, loshadkaaa
... Small, and I wanted more ... brown, and I wanted a gray
dapple ... Derevyannaaayayayaya, and I wanted zhivyyyyuyuyuyu
... Optimist: - A y me LIVE! Just run away!
Guests sat on the New Year, the owner really does not know
what do. Phone call. It fits here and an idea ...
Comes back and yells: - Fire, Fire! All: - Who has the fire? -
I do not hear ... someone of you.
