Acid Paper #02

Программирование

C tapes to disc - Transfer and adaptation of programs from tape to disk.

23. Micromachines / nanocomputer (out of science fiction)
Time: years or fraction of a second - depending on how you're 
at it  look.

Availability: 50 -> 1000 years?
Reliability: Good, while admitting that the technology develops.
Notes: Typically, this technique allows the use of
 Panel replicator. You pass through the machine and it does
 your copy, killing the original source. A duplicate of the 
same little  fix Manual and simplified (but retained the 
ability to manage  machine). Thus, you will gradually transform 
into  half-witted zombies, which runs from the exit of the 
machine to the input  indefinitely. Strange philosophical 
conclusion, but ... Calle: If you advocate nanomachines, why not

 try those that operate on the principle of deconstruction?
 Divide the whole body into its component molecules in less than
 minute ... If you still have not guessed - I'll tell you - 
this is  very stupid method.


24. Scuba diving (options' accidents

    cases')
Time: see notes - more minutes / hours
Availability: Aqualung, and no one around
Reliability: see notes
Notes: The first method - is to rise from a depth of about 30
 meters with breath holding at inspiration. If you
 be able to do this, then your lungs will burst. Second -
 remain at a depth of 30 meters for approximately 30 minutes 
(the time  necessary for the dissolution of nitrogen in the 
blood), then quickly  rise, not respecting the time of 
decompression. It is uncertain  way and can lead to brain 
damage / joints. Third  way - carbon monoxide poisoning - 
carbon monoxide.  Fill the bottles to them and dive away from 
other divers.  Very soon you will fall asleep. See CO poisoning 
in the section. AND  the last way - poisoning by oxygen - that 
is,  you have to dive very deeply with a mixture containing

 a high percentage of oxygen, but it is sometimes problematic.
 The advantage of this method is that insurance companies /
 relatives will be considered your action as an unfortunate
 case, in contrast to CO poisoning. Sources of information
 said: "Lifting from 30 meters with breath holding at 
inspiration,  usually leads to excessive pressure in the lungs, 
possibly  Ny subcutaneous emphysema, lung collapse. Death 
usually  comes from the flooding in his own blood. Enough

 painful and treated during the rescue, but if no help,
 that death is almost certain. You support a long
 Nitrogen-time (30 minutes 30metrov-) and then quickly
 lifting to the surface is very even slavnenko you twist.
 Many chuvs tvovat you will not, but your joints will be
 zaderevenevat half an hour. Death is very unlikely,
 usually from a stroke. Joint damage often occurs
 and / or brain. Maybe you will save, but the damage must
 be. CO poisoning - mix with a decent portion yuugarnogo
 gas cylinders. When you dive, you will fall asleep
 water. Combining with the previous method, we can obtain very
 interesting effect. "

25. Vacuuming brain (silly)
Time: minutes
Availability: You need a Puma (tm) robot and different things 
... Reliability: reliable when properly laid down the program.

Note: You need an industrial robot for the right
 implementation.
 Attach the saw, a suction tube and
 program it. Reinforce the head in time. When you
 well-documented head and run the program. He
 will do a hole in your skull, and there zasunet pipe.
 Program it so that it slid pipe
 back and forth, to be sure that it will suck all.
 It is useful to draw a stream of water into the hole to pipe 
did not suck  only one air all the time. Perhaps, this program 
is very  fun to debug ...


26. MICROWAVE
 Time:?
 Availability: Source of strong microwave radiation.
 Reliability:?
 Notes: Samozapekanie. Problem in raising your
 internal temperature to lethal levels.

 Callie: Does anyone know anything about this? All I know
 I - is the fact that stand in front of the Swedish coastal 
radar  observations (which uses the same frequency as the normal

 microwave oven) is strongly discouraged.

27. Dehydration (dehydration)
 Time: a week or something around?
 Availability: You must ensure that medical
 help
 Notes: Do not eat or drink. Remember that food contains
 a high percentage of water. Avoiding medical help can be
 difficult. See "ugolodatsya vusmert"

28. 'ACCIDENT' during Skydiving
Duration: blazingly fast, which is nice.
Accessibility: we must join the Parachute Club. Consuming
 time and money.
Reliability: Fairly reliable. Although, people falling from 
great  height and live. Injuries received when falling is not

 so easy.
Notes: Join a skydiving club, some time
 continues to train in order to remove all
 suspicion. Then, one day Lay your parachute
 a mess (preferably tied up, but to
 it was not too much) and jump. Parachute did not unfold
 and you reach the final speed of 220 km / h. Death occurs
 instantly with Stress on the planet Earth. One of the 
advantages  this method - is the ability to simulate the 
'unfortunate  case ', so you will not add additional

 pain and guilt to family and friends.
Calle: In addition to this, you need to remove or
 spoil the reserve parachute (which is not so easy). There
 'Accidents' are better than this.

 One guy who is engaged in parachuting very
 critically treated this way because, if everyone will
 use it, then parachuting acquire extremely poor
 reputation.

29. Death From a Thousand Cuts, The modern version of (stupid)
Time: variability
Availability: hank sharp and thin wires .. maybe
 high voltage
Reliability: not very good
Notes: This modern version of the Arabic 'Death of a thousand
 cuts'. The main thing - to jump into a grid of thin sharp
 wire and ride it until death. Can
 bring a high voltage with low frequency, which causes
 your muscles to contract and cause cuts, even if you
 lose consciousness. In addition, you must be sure that
 not skidded off the wires.

30. Crushing
Time: from seconds to minutes, depending on road
 press
Availability: Trans ... any good dump
Reliability: non-monetary, if you can not escape at the last
 moment
Notes: An extremely easy way - get into the car,
 fall under the press and some time to be flattened
 before his death, turned into a bloody mess. Inclusion Press
 can be difficult, but if you hide in the pre-
 machine, then someone can come in and turn it on. There are 
other  ways to be crushed, but it seems that this method

 most effective. I just thought that perebeganie
 street in front of a truck laden also a good option. You
 must remember that people often remain alive at the time
 compression, death occurs after the removal of weight.

31. World War III.
Time: a moment when you're near an important military
 base.
Availability: at your fingertips is a red button? can be
 you're the president?
Reliability: reliably
Notes: All you need - is to start a third world war.
 Release a couple of missiles at the Chinese or the Americans
 [In the original - Russian] ... The advantage of this method 
is that  you're not alone, and take with you the rest.

 The problem is the limited number of people who
 have the necessary authority, and I doubt that anyone
 reading this can do it.

 Calle: much more difficult to apply in this situation
 due to the collapse of the Soviet Union ... stupid method.

32. Heatstroke
Time: 4 hours or a little more
Availability: In very hot day and non-interference neighbors, 
etc.  persons.

Reliability: Depends on the weather
Notes: The main task - to cause a severe heat
 blow. You should spend in the sun for several hours. For
 quickening of the process, you can use aluminum foil to
 the direction of sunlight in your direction. Of course, we must
 start in the morning! Well, when the outside temperature more
 37 degrees.

33. ACID BATH
Time: depends on acid
Availability: We need a lot of very strong acid
Reliability: quite high
Notes: "You exhaust the heat of summer? Adopt new and
 improved acid bath. Nearby, for sure
 there is a metal-manufacturing or service station,
 raspolagayuschy wonderful soothing acid
 baths. You love pain, which climbs from his eyes, and not
 want to bother other clean up your remains? Then this is for
 you! If you do not bother to leave a note, none
 man in the street and not know what happened "

34. IMITATION car bomb
Time: ms
Availability: explosives
Reliability: pretty good, if a lot of explosives.
Notes: This is a modification of the method with explosives. You
 should be at home to make a car bomb,
 lay it in your own car and drive away from home
 previously chatted with neighbors about how well you
 live far away from these Iraqi murderers, without the 
slightest threat  to be killed ... To mislead the competent 
authorities  Put a note in his pocket with the phone numbers of 
all  Foreign embassies, on the contrary which were written 'code

 number 'and random, but large amounts of cash :-) And, yes,
 and more good with it have any book on
 self-defense - thicker.

35. Jumping from BRIDGE (cutting into slices with
 long strings)
Time: 9.87 m/s-2; from 4 to 10 meters ... count themselves
Availability: A rope, long strings and a high bridge
Reliability: fairly reliable
Notes: No one has yet tried. You can try with high
 building, but then disappears art motive for the job. Cut
 rope and the string into pieces of varying lengths. Pieces 
should not be  be longer than the height of the bridge. Tie 
pieces of ropes and strings  One end of the bridge. The other 
ends of rope to tie  different parts of the body such as 
thighs, calves, torso, etc. Then  tie string around the other 
ends of the joints (Do not forget  genitals ...) So when you 
jump, the various parts  your body will be cut off from each 
other by loops of string  and will remain hanging on the ropes, 
rhythmically rocking a  breeze. If you do everything correctly, 
then you end up  get the torso, hanging by the neck over the 
sea / river / highway  or just land. Follow along with friends 
and call  it's art.


36. BE eaten alive
Time: it depends, but probably a couple of minutes.
Availability: zoo or wild African (or other) nature
Reliability: not very impressive ... What if an animal / 
animals will not  will be too hungry and not doedyat you?

Notes: basically, we should find one or more
 predators ... Tigers - very good. Well suited sharks
 lions and other big cats.

37. Burn when entering the atmosphere (silly)
Time: Probably a few minutes
Accessibility: we must get into orbit
Reliability: Reliable as much as you are able to
 implement.
Notes: Exit to the open space in low Earth
 orbit. Then turn down enough to enter the atmosphere.
 You will witness the spectacle!

38. Acquired immunodeficiency syndrome (AIDS)
Time: The incubation period is from 1 to 10 years after death
 2 years after diagnosis. You can be a carrier of the virus
 years / decades.
Dose: Just one intimate relationship with an infected person of 
either sex. Availability: This can be obtained free of charge

Reliability: 99.9% after infection
Notes: This is not painless. Can cost
 significant money if you allow others to assist you
 medical care. Can be difficult for the infection, when
 people who know about their illness simply do not accept you
 infect. Very funny get to your
 tendencies (remember-any sex-you do not have a
 limit - you are going to die, so one must at least
 just try;) operates at extremely obeskurazhiayusche
 your family and close friends. In addition, you get
 enjoy a full examination of his own body. This gives
 another opportunity to yell at your dentist and tell him
 it infects you, until you have suffered in his chair.
 Good luck to die!

Calle: A method loses its reliability as 10 years is enough
 long time, that someone invented a method of treatment.
 IMHO, silly.

39. SAMOAMPUTIROVANIE HEAD WITH MACHINE (added
 Calle)
Time: It's really fast
Availability: You will need access to a car and a rope.
Reliability: Something I do not believe in this method.
Notes: The basic idea is to tie one end of the
 rope around the neck and the other attached to a durable
 stationary objects. Then sit down in a fast car and
 accelerate to maximum speed. When the rope
 natyanetsya, your head will be cut off from the body. Use
 rope of sufficient length and fasten your seatbelt.

 There is evidence that someone in Washington state in the U.S. 
used  this method to commit suicide. So he's still not too

 bad. We used a rope length of 25 feet (7.5 meters)
 that seems a bit short. It seems he had not
 machine, but a beast.

40. Death From body painting. (Very stupid and wrong)
Dose: Less than 1 can of paint, depending on your
 physique
Time:? vozhmozhno less than 8 hours
Availability: Very available! Can choose oil paints.
 Need any type of paint, not allowing your pores to breathe.
 You have a funky color choices for death. Toxic Green?
 Blood-red? Or mostly black? Or any other
 gamma. This method is good also, if you have not yet
 chosen their clothes for the death.
Reliability: It is a reliable method to restrict
 Breathing through the pores. Do not forget to paint the soles 
of the feet. You  need to paint each piece of the body. If the 
pores are  breathe - you die.

Notes: About 5 years ago I read in one of the theater
 magazines that overlaying makeup all over the body, it is 
necessary  leave space for breathing. Otherwise

 Artist dies. Normally, when applying make-up on the whole body 
is not  grimiruyut soles of the feet and other body parts to

 do not suffocate.

 Calle: This is a * very * stupid method. Moreover, it is not
 work. You can look in any textbook on anatomy,
 that the skin does not breathe. The only places that absorb
 oxygen - a light and the cornea and the cornea is only fed
 autonomously. However, you may become ill or even die for
 the use of toxic paints.