They won't defeat us

Forwarded by Evgeny Poddubny Orig.Area: SU.HUMOR Orig.From: Alexander Ryabukhin (2:5047/42) Orig.To : All () Orig.Subj: Orig.Date: Sat 6 February 2002 Orig.Time: 12:41:48 FWD ═══════════════════════════ Greetings, All! I haven't laughed so hard in a long time! ;))) ═══════════════════════════════ ════════════════════════════════ ═══════ Forwarded by Alexander Ryabukhin ■ 03 February 2002 10:11 ■ From: Eugene Sodin (2:461/112.12) ■ To: All ■ Area: RU.ANECDOT ■ Subj: Anecdote of the day and history of the day - 02/1/2002 =============================================================================== ======= Hello All. ***Most popular story of the day*** Almost according to Okhlobystin. Told by a friend. Next - from the first person. In our regiment, young village soldiers were made fun of for about like this: they woke me up in the middle of the night and sent me to the unit on duty for the keys to... vagina. The duty officer was rowdy, the young man got it, and the demobilization had fun... A certain Vardan began his service in one of the rifle companies. Slant fathoms at the shoulders, about two meters tall, weighing over a hundredweight. Alas, the heroic appearance lacked the epic ingenuity - the guy managed to write his own name with errors, and to master the drill commands "right" and "left" spent three weeks. However, on his face There was always the serene smile of a man unencumbered by brains.This is what predetermined his fate - at night he was awakened by demobilization. - Listen, brother Vardan, we need help. Help me out. Trouble! - What's the problem?! Let me sleep! - The company commander ordered the sergeant to bring the keys to the vagina. And the sergeant is drunk. If he enters the headquarters in this form, he will be immediately put on trial. A he has a week left to serve... So run to the regimental duty officer and take the vagina keys from him. Vardan jumped out of the bed and began to get dressed. Just in case, I asked: - Dembel-jan, what is a “vagina”? - This, Vardan-jan, is a secret training room tank submariners. It's very humid there. That's why it's called that. The duty officer is aware. Well, come on, Vardan. Don't let me down!!! On the way from the barracks to the headquarters, Vardan was stopped a couple of times guard and internal regiment patrols. However, after hearing about the keys for vagina, they released him, wishing him good luck in such an important task. The squad at headquarters, having learned what keys Private Vardan had arrived for, immediately I saluted him and escorted him to the duty room. There the major on duty was snoring peacefully, and the assistant on duty, a two-year lieutenant, languidly leafed through last year's "AIDS-INFO". - Comrade Lieutenant-jan. Private Hakobyan has arrived for the keys! - Vardan reported. - What keys?! - The keys, Lieutenant-jan. Didn't demobilization tell you? These... There are always very wet... Wow... I forgot... - Bani? - No! - Laundry?! - They train underwater tankers there.- Whom?!!!! Are you stoned, private? - Dembel said that underwater tankers are being trained there... And I remembered... Give me the keys to the vagina, Lieutenant-jan. Otherwise the company sergeant will be imprisoned... The two-year lieutenant liked the idea. He ordered Vardan to leave duty officers and wait in the corridor. He grinned and began to wake up the duty officer. 3 am. Everyone is sleeping. Vardan did not return. Probably patrol him on the lip dragged. Well, what the heck... Sweet is the dream of demobilization... The phone rang on the nightstand. The orderly languidly reached for the receiver and... - Company! Rise!! Alarm!!! - he screamed in falsetto. A minute later the company stood on the parade ground. The regiment's political officer approached. - Attention! At ease! Recover! Leave it alone! Attention! At ease! Lying support accept!!! Now listen to what I have to say. In order to improve combat training personnel and in connection with the assignment of a submarine company to us I order the tankers to dig a vagina measuring two by two by two meters. Fill with water. Spray the resulting soil evenly over the space. Due to shovels will not be given out under confidentiality. You will dig with crowbars, water wear - in mugs. I entrust Private Vardan Hakobyan to lead the work. Report on execution. Half an hour later, the chief’s UAZ drove up to the completely exhausted company. headquarters - Major! What the fuck? - Here, we’re digging the vagina, comrade colonel. - What the hell?!The political officer whispered something in his ear. The chief of staff nodded understandingly and left, Finally shouting to the company: “Company!!! Gases!!!!!!” - Which of you will go for the keys to the owner... Khachik Martirosyan. ═════════════════════════THE END OF FORWARD═══════════════════════════ Best wishes Alexander -+- GoldED+/386 1.1.4 + Origin: Magadan. The North-East of Russia (2:5047/42) FWD ═══════════════════════════ SAYO:NARA, DO:ZO O-GENKI-DE, Evgeny Poddubny. @ZXNet 500:4232/1.777 | Fidonet 2:5045/78.777