Star Wars jokes

Get Msg, All! === Cut === Something about Star Wars: --------------------------- Super hit .Star War I: The Hidden Threat for. already coming with great success on screens Russia, and we continue We open (starts at N 48.Fri.) talk about little-known shi- facts from history to the public ries of a distant galaxy, will come manna directed by jord- Let's call Lucas. In the last issue- we stopped at curiosities, discovered by movie fans sagas in various series of the cycle... .It’s longer in parsecs... One of the most famous punctures is considered an episode when yes the robot R2D2 turns out to be predatory by Jawas - short ones with glowing eyes. Camera shows close-up ba- puppy of a captive android and on a moment behind one of his little eyes. the face of a sitting person appears th inside the Lilliputian actor. Slo- vom, but the king is not real yass!. Another curiosity related to R2D2. We know that he moves is on wheels, built-in two short legs... Te- now ask yourself the question: on what what distance can advance it's clearly not an easy barrel to push on small wheels on sand dunes? That's right, not at all inch! And our little hero smartly cuts through the expanses of the desert tyn of the planet Tatooine. Another .ambush.: hired Han Solo shows off to Obi Van Kenobi and Luke will soon- the strength of his ship, declaringthat he easily squeezes out so much some parsecs. How dense ignorance! And as soon as Khan passed the driving test her dishes? After all, parsec is a measure not speed, but distance. The jacket has dissolved Those were blunders. from episode IV - .New hope.. Let's see... back to episode V - .Empire on- strikes back... When an imperial cruiser begins pursuit of the ship for Solo in the asteroid field, for slow viewing shows that the first ace he destroyed was The teroid explodes even before how the laser beam hits it. Further, finishing training at Master Yoda's, Luke raises- gets into his fighter and flies away. Please note: the hero is enters the cabin along the ladder, then subsequently mysteriously disappear- cabbage soup Then when Darth Vader cuts off Luke's hand, we can to see her intact at the moment Skywalker sliding into the tunnel le, in which he is a minute later falls. And the most delicious puncture. Han Solo dressed in his favorite sleeveless vest, frozen in carbonite. However, in .Return- Jedi Research Institute. defrosting it ut in one shirt! Unhearing Lando We smoothly move on to the strange there.Return of the Jedi.. Please review the epi- battle with Jabba's men Hatta at Saalak's Well! Black- Han Solo's leathery friend Lando Calrissian (Billy Dee Wil- hole) along the way it turns out sometimes with gloves, sometimes without them. Next, the rebel fleet is ready turns to attack. Bug-eyed administratorral orders: Prepare- switch to hyperdrive by means of her team! Lando, I control- in the absence of Solo Thousand summer falcon, obediently clicks: I understand you. No shit but he didn’t understand, because he didn’t- slowly after your meek words this eccentric is pulling the lever and flies off into the blue distance, not yet waiting for the admiral's command. And finally, one smart person the catcher suspected that in the scene, where Luke tries to kill the Imper- tora, and Darth Vader in the last the moment reflects his laser strike with a sharp sword, not everything is pure. Check reve the geometry of the episode on com- computer, he discovered that he was using Luke's living beings actually destroy beats the Emperor's shoulder, but this it's just not obvious on a large scale plan. It's the creators who screwed it up whether special effects, who painted glowing blades of swords. Topless Filming such a large-scale movie, like Star Wars, just not could do without a number of fun- new cases. One such tragic the mic episode caused a fair amount of a lot of noise in the fan community. In .Return of the Jedi. there is a scene where Jabba is cruel The Hutt throws him into a pit to be eaten I'm freaking out my dancer Oolu. The very fact of disgusting behavior Jabba's voice doesn't excite anyone shaft He's a villain after all. But the point is that the actress, playing our victim, during the filming of one I lost my bra in one of the takes. And it is precisely this double that is missing The editor's work ended up in the film! Everything happened in a split second yes, but attentive viewersdid you notice it? There was a scandal- chick. Lucas had to later edit this episode for release of the film on cassette tapes. After all, on VCR. there is one function as .freeze frame. - and smart children could half- give legal access to entertainment feeling, which is certainly traumatic would ruin their delicate psyche. (end to follow) Materials stripes prepared Elena CHEKULAEVA "Petersburg TV Viewer" #51 '99 === Cut === *Crossposted in 529.VS.651 *Crossposted in 4311.LOCAL *Crossposted in KAMCHATKA.TALKS *Crossposted in ZX.TALKING [I.ZX] Warm greetings, Slava! [We don’t need the sun - the party is shining for us, we don’t need bread - give us work!]