Cheburashka
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BY STEPANOV SERGE 'CO.
SCHOOL N287 - MPEI
1991 - 1992.
Music by Shov
PART I.
Chapter One. Prologue.
Cheburashka was driving a green Volkswagen in
Braytenshtrasse-5. It was spring. His large ears blowing
breeze. But despite it all his thoughts were busy
thoughts about the "frog". "The Frogs" are the secret
association of neo-fascists in Southern Uganda, which soon
should send a batch of novocaine
because of the Southern Urals. These machinations involved in
Gal.
At this time in the ports of Southern California
periodically pop up crocodile Gena, downloading at their side
detachments of recruits from Kolobkova family. Rigorous course
on north-west (toward the Limpopo (part
Persian Gulf)) flew Old Hottabych, waging illegal surveillance
loading Genes (k Gennady Gennadievich direct relationship does
not have (prim.avt.)): "How where are they? "- Cheburashka
thought wistfully, listening as the machine whistling fragments
of Soviet bombs, there is
SJM bursting with melodic bang.
But here's a car stopped near the
small five-storey mansion, where the headquarters, which was
headed by Gal. Cheburashka, carefully disguised
paper airplane, crept to the sixth floor and
fell with a crash at Galya, who hung a portrait of Hitler on
the wall.
- Excuse me, Fraulein - gallantly bowing sharknuv and ears
on the floor said Cheburashka, immediately said to himself:
"A floor is not washed since last month ..."
Then erasing with his left foot savory spit,
added: "And yesterday, was again and again Toby
Drunk. "He was not jealous Galia. He was
just a pity that the pretty girl, has controlled such cases.
"Such a cutie disappears in the clutches of this dog ... "
Gal got off the table.
- Sit down, pal, maybe a smoke?
- She took out from his back pocket firm
cap perfect Havana cigar and handed Cheburashka. So she usually
began particularly important cases. Cheburashka and lit a
cigarette, lost in smoke, plunged into
memories. Galya was silent. She never
spoke before the agent has finished smoking.
Cheburashka knew that at this time in Southern California
ended in the port of loading of the crocodile Genes, and that
in a few days, he will be in Berlin.
- Are you asleep? - Galia shook him by the ears,
Cheburashka and, swallowing a cigarette butt (bad habit,
acquired in one of the special forces), stupidly staring at
Atamansha.
- The well-known channels - beginning Galya - we learned
that gibus commando landed on the Taimyr Peninsula, in order to
prevent early to execute our plan for the extraction of raw
materials there and dispatch it to the Urals.
Gibus worked for Soviet intelligence about eleven years,
but without success. This helped her Old Hottabych and superspy
Piggy and Stepashka.
Cheburashka sadly digested this information, then dig a
bayonet-knife neproglotivshiysya piece of cigars, said:
- What do you want from me, Fraulein?
- You must notify the Gene to
He floated to Berlin as sparingly as possible.
- But how?
- This will help you Chandra - she
snapped her fingers. Leo entered the room,
which in the fourth management called
"Thunder-Chandra. He chewed on a tomato, but
Seeing the portrait on the wall, he was shouting "Heil
Hitler "threw his hand forward, and the unfortunate crash of
the ripe vegetables drawn Hitler's mustache, which looked
reproachfully at Lion.
Tomato juice dripped from his portrait fun
Gale and dripped over the collar.
- Excuse me, Fraulein - with debility
Chandra said, a smile - I did not mean to offend you ... That
is Hitler ... and you and the Fuhrer, I mean ...
- Look! - Galia interrupted his thoughts, and seizing
Cheburashka's ears, threw in the face with Chandra.
- Well, - sounded disappointed
Lion in the hallway - you her whole soul, and
it is you that body.
He pulled out a mane Cheburashka and comfortably taking
his hind leg, started in end of the corridor. "That's -
thinking Cheburashka in flight - as always: all my fault ...
"He hit the lodge a shovel and lost consciousness.
Chapter Two.
Gene swam in the ocean measured overarm. Balls on his back
were playing whist and heavily misused. Gena suddenly heard the
sound of the propeller and just in case pretended to be an
American battleship. But this was only Carlson, who, disguised
as a spy satellite, handed him a telegram from Chandra. Gene
ripped the package and read the encrypted text: "There was a
grandmother gray goat."
- Damn! - Gene said, again
this old woman trying to stop us! Then
he added, referring to kolobok: - Guys, dive!
Depth was small - about two hundred and fifty feet, and
balls began to sing military song "We're from the grandmothers
are gone! .."
- Quiet, small fry! - Shouted at them
Gene, knowing that somewhere nearby should
be the Nautilus General CIA Nemo. All
went well, except that one day they scared aunt Tortilla, which
under the guise of neutral mine plied the Atlantic Ocean. After
thirty-six hours Gena surfaced in the bathroom Headquarters
Ghali. His first noticed Chandra, who, hidden from the Tobique,
Lacan whiskey.
- Healthy, Green! - Happily he cried, and crawled to kiss,
but pulled back Gene.
- Fraulein at home?
- Yes, but it has now Cheburashka.
- I have this Cheburashka - roared Gene ears
the feet of the tie! - He was raging, so that balls are a bit
stale.
Gene into the room without his coat Ghali, and bibs, as he
had taken, and just like that. Cheburashka was sitting on his
lap Ghali, and she bandaged his head. His
found only an hour ago, after a basketball shot thugs, Chandra
had to lain nearly a half days at the lodge with a shovel.
Gene, seeing that nothing terrible
is a little calmer.
- Gene Herr - Galya said, scratching
Cheburashka behind the ear - with your usual greeting?
- Bai, fyurerchik! - Gene graciously sent
Hitler, a kiss, from which
portrait of tears.
- A cynic and a vandal ... - Muttered Galya -
Reported! Instead of answering, Gene took from
pocket of the three volumes of the Great Soviet Encyclopedia
and buhnul them on the table Ghali, pinched while the right ear
of Cheburashka, which filthy curses erupted in
Genes address.
- Do you ears on the table does not scatter! -
Gene snapped.
- Relax! - Galya said Cheburashka and handed into the
clutches of the Crocodile, which putting it in his pocket, went
out into the corridor.
The corridor was booze: balls drunk
lemonade, and Chandra brewed grog from Pernod and
"Smirnoff". In the wide-open window came the occasional
quotations from the speech Hitler. This Winnie the Pooh bred
anti-Soviet propaganda. Piglet now and then ran to the nearest
beer stand and he offered Winnie the Pooh large mug of beer
"Lahden", which he swallowed in large quantities
and no bread.
Sometimes Piglet could pull off a few liters of grog
Chandra. Soon Winnie the Pooh was not able to make speeches of
the great Leader and with a cry of "Bears are very fond of
Honey! ".. has launched a mug to nearby
rabbit and collapsed in a drunken fiddler. Piglet, so as not to
produce excitement in the crowd started a gramophone with a gay
twist and pulling braces, shouted: "And now a disco! .."
- ... How did they bother, - said
Galya, wrinkling his nose and went to the phone,
to dial out of three hundred and forty
eight characters.
In the tube clicks were heard, and then
bleating voice:
- Police Commissioner Eeyore listens.
- Listen, Eeyore, issued an enhanced dress
the square in front of my house.
A few minutes later drove to the area eleven armored
vehicles, of which poured riot squad of thirty-three warriors
with Sgt Chernomorov headed.
They damask swords broke up the dancing and climbed back
into the APCs and with the song "Deutchen soldaten und
offizieren ..." left.
The street was quiet.
Cheburashka stood at the window and smoked, flicking ashes
into the shoes of the Director, to leave no traces. Gene
noticed these spyware proclivities, and raising Cheburashka by
the scruff on his level of muzzle, clearly sent the animal far
away in those places where he was born. Cheburashka huffy
and, having escaped from the clutches of genes that ran to the
far end of the corridor, fifty meters, and stood in a rack.
- Come here, a green mug! - Shouted
He clasped his hands mouthpiece.
- That you're dead, long-eared creature, dumpling
shell-shocked! - Politely answered the gene but did not dare to
approach, as Cheburashka was famous in the fourth control
ability to quickly pick up speed. Like
motorcycle "Harley" the latest model, he
carried away by the roar "to the point, leaving behind clouds
of white smoke. Gene also ran slowly, like a bicycle, "Pal",
released before the Battle of Grunwald. Therefore, he modestly
pulled from the sleeve of the anti- system "Patriot", which
never left since the Iraq war, even in bed.
The battle began. Cheburashka put blocks
and missiles, explosion, blew whitewash from the ceiling and
otkolupyvali plaster from the walls. Know what would have
ended, but arrived in time Chandra, who differing fighting.
- Nerds! - He said, waving
smoke from the missile and frowning - a now-Ghali in a meeting.
There's just you.
The room did have everything, from Piglet and ending with
a drunken Winnie the Pooh, who was lying in a corner and a strum
drum singing "Lavender."
Cheburashka entered and saluted:
- Picture! - He's a little Lisp, so
How to skip a single rocket, and it knocked out
his front teeth. The meeting began.
- Lord! - Said Galya - need
neutralize a group of capture, which we
could detect in the Barents Sea. Composition
groups as follows:
a) The Mickey Mouse - a defector, who emigrated from his
native country under the guise of an armored train.
b) Little Red Riding Hood - the former currency
hooker with a twenty-year experience.
a) Raven Karkusha altered under
fighter MIG-29 ", a friend of children. She
knows too much.
d) The king's son, Elisha, moves on
Mercedes with dvizhkkom of trophy Shuttle "Shuttle" with
fourteen solid-fuel boosters.
e) and f) bioengineer Carlo, nicknamed
"Dad" and cover the entire group biorobot
Pinocchio, abbreviated as "BUR", made of
improvised materials. Spare no.
Very strong, but very stupid.
They have their own medical care - is Malvina, a
gynecologist. Very capable - offhand hits from Squirtwoman a
light bulb. Detachment of a protected group of chemical
defense, led by Chipollino. What will be the suggestions?
- Give the people of beer! - Sleepily sung yet sober
Winnie the Pooh.
- A champagne do not want? - Yelled
Galya and launched his countess, but missed and hit the
Cheburashka. All steel to speak, but nothing came up. Here
Piglet took the floor:
- Dear Fraulein, and others -
he said, - I have developed the following plan
Action:
BO-PERVYX: encircle the whole group and cover them in
place.
BO-VTORYX: agents Karkushu and Chipollino - in the soup.
- Are you the soup would taste better - muttered Chandra -
and then black, and even under the MIG-29 "...
In-TRETIX: - continued pig
warily glancing at "thugs-Chandra,
- Thirdly, to incite Elisha Cheburashka, let him go to ram.
- I pghotestuu! - Shouted Cheburashka - I ve OSU, because
I oyus his then ve aydut and otechat me!
- You no one asks - evil
Galya threw and turned to Piglet.
- Go on.
- In-CHETVERTYX: hung around Malvina bulbs - let us not
shoot and way.
In-PYATYX: all.
- A Red Riding Hood? And Pinocchio with
Carlo? A Mickey Mouse?
- Little Red Riding Hood, I take -
Chandra said, making hand gesture, as if
He skis, and grinned impudently.
- More precisely, under him - smiled Galya - well, what
next?
- Biorobot will assume the Pooh: a
their intellects are the same, - neigh Gene
and Winnie the Pooh pretty prourchal:
- It is better that no light ...
- You're still in this - in confidence
whispered Piglet.
- God is with you ... - Mused Galya - Proposal accepted.
Tomorrow for you will arrive by helicopter. Questions?
- No! - Roared Gene and Chandra together.
- Excellent. And now ...
Suddenly the door opened with a bang,
and a man in military uniform.
- Lieutenant Rzhevskii! - He introduced himself. And then
the fun, as if to himself, sang: "Tarara!
- Where are the Tatars? - In an indescribable horror
thundered Pooh his drum set and took aim at the gun with
Rzhevsky Navarone (nineteen inches).
- Quiet! - Said Galya - Calm down.
- Sleep, sleep! - Piglet bustled around
Fluff.
- Sit down, lieutenant - Galya politely
Cheburashka kicked off his chair, and the gene to
he did not run away, stepped on his ear.
- Lieutenant, tell us about yourself society - Galya said,
and explained to the audience - This is our new agent.
- It's too long, sir, - boomed
Rzhevskii - better read sir!
He drew from his inside pocket a roll of toilet paper
covered with writing small handwriting.
- It is well, then honor. Weapons
there? What?
- If you remove the first two letters, I
I say - the lieutenant took his sword and threw it
on the table.
- Elegant! So you can take over
Carlo, nicknamed "Papa" - Toby barked.
Galya agreed with him, and at this meeting is over.
The head of another.
Part of the Soviet intelligence slowly
moved across the tundra. Peacefully banged wheels Prince
Elisha, moving at light speed. Behind him, not behind or in
step in the cart drove Mickey Mouse. Malvina a little tired and
walked, holding his side carts Mickey. Following hobbled,
leaning on three-inch pipe, Pinocchio. Karkusha,
Bellow turbouskoriteli, flew ahead
exploration, and its wings still flapping
long resounded in the distance.
Despite pyatidesyatigradusny cold, very thick of the sun,
and Chipollino started to become rotten, and very little smell
slightly. Ahead was an explosion - it was once Karkusha sound
barrier.
Mickey Mouse hat pushed back on his head
and, opening his vest on the reindeer fur
corrected recoilless gun, which hung on his gum on the padded
shorts. Red Beanie thoughtfully chewed coconuts
just plucked from the dwarf palm.
Pope Carlo tried to shake out of cheshek nabivshihsya there
monitors. He had already extract pieces of twelve, but there
remained still the same.
Suddenly, shots rang out in front and
ominously offended croak. Soon there was Karkusha, plucked and
podpalennaya (this Gena the crocodile got into it from the
"Patriot").
- Help! - She coughed - Ambush!
At the same time because of the dwarf birch with a roar
broke Cheburashka and swept past the crazed, fear Chipollino
stink even more, and ran to Elisha. There was a massive
explosion, and punched on form of Cheburashka Mercedes rolled
over and exploded with a barely audible squeak. More refractive
onion smell - it Rzhevskii chop Chipollino. Singling out the
acrid smoke, bursting bulbs that Malvina faithfully shot from
Squirtwoman. Carlson took care of it, reviewing the Master Diy
pre-war sample. Mickey Mouse blow off steam with a slight
knock, whistling and smoking, tried to escape, but for lack of
rail only went deeper in the red-hot taiga sand. Here he was
captured deft Piglet's movement.
Chandra tempted Little Red Riding Hood
telling her biography of Mao Zedong. Dad
Carlo tried to flee, but the monitors in the Czech
fear bustling, and Carlo fell. Instantly he was tied python Kaa.
Winnie the Pooh brought down Pinocchio,
proving that he (Winnie) - cloud, rather
not a bear. Bur overheated and raplavilsya,
forming a puddle of alcohol.
All reconnaissance group was captured.
Elisha was not just - it drove Cheburashka by warm waters
of the Arctic Ocean.
The tundra spread the smell of chicken soup mixed with
diesel fuel. It was cooked Karkushu. From the pan sticking her
last gesture, made in this world - fig.
- Carlson - Galya said, stirring
bucket Karkushu - a favor, go look Cheburashka.
Soon they returned to Berlin. Fuhrer
the portrait beaming and winking to everyone who
looked at him. Rang out from the basement
cries - it's Toby tortured Carlo. Others
sunbathing on the roof and drank champagne, only
Chandra just messed around with Little Red Riding Hood
who did not want to let him go.
Soon, the roof appeared Tobique with bloody hind legs.
- Carlo confessed: gibus is
in the Caspian Sea .- he wiped his paws on the snow-white
blouse and Galina smiled.
The next day was Carlson. He
Elisha was carrying that caught in the jungle
Australia, but found no Cheburashka.
The operation was done in style, without
losses. Galya was very pleased. "Sorry
that it was not returned Cheburashka - thought
it - but he must return. And he comes back. Necessarily. "
Next Chapter
Cheburashka appeared only a month later.
He came to the Gale desperately emaciated, with
torn ears, dirty and hungry.
- Wow! - He said, barely audible
whisper, turning to the portrait, which is a
unconcealed regret looking at him.
"It's amazing, - said Galya - Cheburashka have again grown
front teeth."
If she knew how difficult
animal grind them out of the coastal cliffs
island of Hokkaido. Going to Gale, he fell
on her knees, buried his face in a mini skirt
and wept. Doing this he found
Gene and Tobique.
"My poor teeth!" - Sad thought
Cheburashka, suspended from the ceiling behind the ears
Considering silicon litter away from teeth
on the floor. He scratched his jaw,
which thundered in response.
Cheburashka hung in the closet of the fourth
Management meekly as Xristos. Warmed his hope that maybe
somebody find him, at least in the coming week. AND
Hope its true. From ventilation
Mowgli and the pipe fell off, without saying a word, pulled off
Cheburashka from the ceiling, dragged somewhere.
Cheburashka rudely dragged behind
foot on the stairs.
- Where am I being taken? - He asked, and
Mowgli willingly answered:
- You throw in the Caspian area,
destroy the army Urfin Dzhyus with his wooden soldiers.
- What, I have one? - Shouted in horror Cheburashka,
assuming a head step. Finally, it was dragged into the light of
day.
On the street a drizzling rain, and the earthquake in
twelve points on the Richter scale poorly shook the leaves on
the trees. At the entrance stood bike disguised as a "Kamaz"
with the refrigerator. Behind the wheel sat the main driver of
the fourth control Cat-in-boots, which had very little
representation not only about riding, but also about
Walking on two legs. He handed Cheburashka
order, written by an even hand Ghali. In
It was said that Cheburashka appointed
shock battalion commander, in the
which included: Cat-in-boots, Baba Yaga,
previously served in the Strategic Missile Forces, sister and
Alyonushka brother Ivanushka main fighters in Samos
north-west Africa, and finally Kashchei
immortal - the main alcoholic Berlin
throughout East Germany.
"Well, the company ..." - Cheburashka thought, looking
inside the refrigerator. There all stood at attention and
observe Silence, except for Kashchei that
loud hiccup.
- At ease ... - Sadly said Cheburashka and shut the door.
Inside heard Deaf blows - it's beat the immortal Kashchei
for damaging the atmosphere.
- Hello, boss, - promyaukal from the cockpit
driver - it's time to go. Cheburashka has climbed into the cab,
and KAMAZ started.
Cyclists under the "KAMAZ" drove at speeds of one thousand
four hundred seventy-eight km / hr. Cheburashka was asleep, and
the cat-in-boots read "The Book of Tasty and Healthy Food"
on which missed the day to enter the fourth administration.
In the refrigerator was cold - about
plus sixty degrees. Sister
Alyonushka painted eyes, and brother Ivanushka
checked the combat readiness of his favorite "Katyusha". Baba
Yaga "half" of the engine stupa - she choked carburetor, and
broken recoil kick-starter.
Kashchei immortal drank another bottle
schnapps.
Appeared in front of Customs. Cat-in-boots, not picking up
behind the wheel and not looking up from Books stepped on the
gas. Mather got a goat, "and, breaking stone building custom,
went to a point.
Coming soon shore of the Caspian Sea, over which,
masquerading as kettles, The Dragon and flew a Boeing 747 with
superspy on board.
- Around spies. My God ... - Muttered Cheburashka and
pulled out a spare Wheel submarine mark "Make yourself".
Because of the machine rose into the air Baba Yaga, the jet
engines humming. But they were not strongly regulated, and a
sheaf the fire burnt the grass at the forty kilometers around,
looking up at sea tsunami lung.
Sister and brother Alyonushka Ivanushka
went around the sea looking to see if
ambush. Half an hour later they met at
the opposite shore, and up to Cheburashka
Easy tornado lifted Puss-in-boots
who was washing the car, told the words: "Boss,
all ok!
- Well, - said Cheburashka himself and gathering "Make
yourself", sank in dense, radioactive water of the Caspian Sea.
Continued in the next issue.
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