Virtual World #07 15 августа 1997

Юмор

Tusovka - As correctament behave at the banquet table? Jokes.

            Party


(C) MR.JOHN / JS



   Give in, and then protrezveesh!


  or how to correct behavior

   themselves at the banquet table



           First:
to please the owners, the threshold should ask their names.


           Second:
eating spirits know for its norm. In
Otherwise you risk to drink less.


           Third:
Be careful of holiday
table! Remember that the danger zone GUEST - a circle with a 
radius equal to the length of the left hand plus the length of 
the fork. 


           Away:
should eat slowly and sedately. But do not get carried away 
too, as not all guests know the rules of etiquette. Toss the 
bastards, like a madman, do not have time to blink an eye - 
already nothing!



          In-some:
In some places women at
table do not put. According to the custom of these
a woman's place food on the table should
steal and dashing gallop away on horseback. Cry, noise, chase, 
fight! Then they all get married.



         B-six hundredth:
"New Russian" is not razreshaetsya
use a fork. Sprats,
sausages and cucumbers, they can impale themselves on the 
fingers. 


 Asleep at the table can be a guest
fun to play. For example, to swap his knife and fork!

 If you still remember where right
but no longer remember where the left, then
know that the knife must be kept in
right hand on the right and fork - in
the second hand on the right (For Krishna - many-armed Shiva 
should keep the plug in the second left

the upper hand and knife in the third
bottom right. (See "The Sutra of tasteless, but healthy food)

 If, during the Gala Dinner, you were under the table, then
remember that you're still a citizen of his stranay and have 
the right to choose and be elected to the authorities ... 
(However, all that you have eaten, may be used against

you ...)

 If you are seeing close to a
interest you dish or
vodka (well, you never know, something vodka
you found it interesting), and
can not reach enough
pull a little cloth on itself.


         And, last:
polite guest - not the one who
fall under the table, and those who do not
notice the drop under the table.


           Red Burda 1997.

________________________________


 And now of course again
Mr.John with his jokes
(That's boring is not it?).



  Is an Uzbek by rail
and leads a donkey. Is himself, and sings ... But then behind 
him whistle:



       -CLT-u-u and-and! ! !


  But Uzbek goes further, leading a donkey and singing his song.


       -CLT-u-u and-and! ! !


  And the train run over Uzbek ...


  At the hospital, Uzbeks again stitched together,
collected and sent home. Well,
home course feast arranged,
summoned neighbors, doctors,
relatives. Everything was: and pilaf
and vodka, and a snack. All drink
for doctors, for the miraculous recovery of the Uzbeks. But 
then whistled Maker: 


        -CLT-y-and-and-and!


  Uzbek pounced on him with
with a stick and banged on it
shouting:


  - There should be killed before they
small! ! !


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