Nicron #36 29 мая 1997

Самиздат

Story - Well, user, wait a minute! (Continued).

 ° °

                      OU, user, wait!
 ° °



(R) MDF HACKER

    (A guide to extract the maximum pleasure
         of their duties)

Now we need to find a replacement, because I can not throw moe 
favorite place, my stupid, but tender users, my ... However, no 
, The program I take with me. Need-it-yourself napishet.No 
where to look ? Put an ad in BOFH news? But this will require a 
couple of days to issue the magazine, and a pair exist yet - 
the selection of candidates. And I can not wait to change a 
lifestyle. So, do pridetsya on uproschennomu scenario. Berem 
list of graduates MIEM, choose a random If only he lived 
nearby, and invite you to a great besedu.Nostalgiya thing 
myself - a graduate MIEM. 

"Hi!"
"Sam Hi!
"Need a job?"
"And how!"
"Electromagnetic here, emergency switch here."
"OK."

Now a new place, turn on the computer ... And play a little with
rookie! Prichem play-in all senses. First, in the figurative.
I called him (by your number) and tell: "You already made a 
backup? If not, the floppy disk in the cabinet. And start 
immediately. " 

Silence ..... Had he bought into? Something is wrong! After two 
hours I go into my old room, and I see: this is almost user sits

backup'it 259 floppy disk, while the slightly dusty streamer 
stands quietly nearby, and the null device is also 
well-bezdeystvuet.Da It seems to be here a long time 
zaderzhitsya.Vidimo, mathematician, was caught ... "Okay, come 
on, let's play in FlipFlop!" "Wait a minute, I'm finished. 
"Well, that's just an unhealthy passion for the work, let us 
treat .. Or the chase? Five minutes later, the last check .... 
I called him, and nick voice announce: "I have a heated drive." 
And, of course, I hear the standard: "Well, zasun'te it 
yourself ..." "It slipped, but it is still warm and not 
working, "I declare I am. He embarrassed and zamolkaet.Nu 
exactly matematik.I not even applied. However, crumples it? I 
have a new place and I am quite udovletvoren. 

             Tenth Day

Like, Vse ok, Friday 13, and I NashBOFH, bliss
complete inactivity, but something troubles me. No usual working
situation, there is nobody to joke joke, no one punished for 
stupidity Yes, I still can posharit Network, to drain anything 
with BBS, but it does not yields the sensation of fullness of 
life to which I am accustomed to. 

Well, at least, there is time to clean up
for journal articles ... The special issue has already been 
delayed for four days due to the fact that I does not exist yet 
sent an article about the most interesting Viruses that change 
+ + to -, * and ** for t.p.v files. C *, and the complexity of 
this approach in the case of a recipient Pascal. The rest is 
little things like the next issue of BOFH's top ten games 
(FlipFlop, etc.), BOFH's humour (that's this story I'm writing 
for the next issue) and others have sent. So after twenty 
minutes, I am free again, and begin to understand that so long 
can not continue. 

Phone call.
"Hello?" joyfully I cry into the phone.
"Hello?" It's my "heir".
"Hi!"

"Yes it is Hi-Hi, but I have a problem ..." he says. Oh, boy,
and after all could live and live. I'd have because of the 
nostalgia holil, bereg and cherished. Finger could not touch, 
if you do not proiznes this magic word "problem." And if I 
touched, it quickly and painlessly. 

"Yes, I listen very carefully," I said sympathetically. "I can 
not I understand how you stood there? They got me! "And indeed,

it has filed three complaints, two of which he missed, and his 
chief of prochel, and his accent, he cleaned up somehow, and, 
finally, no one call an ambulance today was not. He is either 
too humanity, or simply a sadist, and leaves a crippled without 
medical assistance.


"Very simply," I say .... Serve as a critical test of knowledge
scratch. If he read the BOFH (and this is the minimum, without 
which it can not survive in this world), then he has one last 
chance, but if not. "Look at the control cabinet power cord is 
the thickest? So, this is not cable, it's door handle. Open. 
"But he's under shock! "


Yes ... While Vse scenario. Either he read and pretends libo.Da
Would I told you to take him if he was energized?
"Is also on the script I said. Shkvorchanie as from eggs in the 
pan. He did not read the classics. And here I am again on svoem 
place again under my fingers usual buttons, again straining the 
phone .. I take the tube. "Hello !....." My voice sounds sweet 
.. I hope is calling you, dear reader. "Ask not for whom the 
phone rings. It tolls for thee. "Almost a quote.


Text: Paul Grodekov

            THE END