solid jokes - watch commander.
Collection of statements by Soviet officers (continued).
Anecdote about the Chukchi and geologist.
Advertising - Advertisements and announcements ...
SOLID FUN
(R) Pavel Fedin
WATCH COMMAND
zuboneprokusaemym with strap and Johansen
Hours are 8 arrows. Four of them show the time remaining -
spare, to confuse potential enemy. The arrows are covered with
a special composition, whereby they glow in the dark, and serve
to dazzle the enemy. The radiation dose is sufficient for
radiation damage in a radius of 200 meters. For simplicity, the
angle between the hour and minute hands is always direct.
All gears are made hours of the most advanced transistors
and circuits. In the manufacture of hours to use the best
Western technology: explosion welding, riveting gas assembly
sober. Gold-plated watch case galvanized tungsten.
Hours of commanding the factory with a half-turn, in the
northern parts of the country to them is attached a special pen
for the plant in the cold. If ingestion of sand hours they will
begin work as sand.
In a combat situation automatically clockwork ticking, and
the clock starts ticking. At the critical moment the commander
can throw them in the direction of the enemy. When This
built-in speaker beeps commanding voice: "Follow me! In attack!
"In the dark hours in a whisper said:" Do not worry, I'm with
you! ".
Buy watch commander! This will be the most pleasant hours in
your life!
Our advertising
FIRM Carl Clara G.m.b.H. " (FRG) is elementary supply at
Soviet market all you want 220 AC / DC compatible
computers
"Gauleiter"
Computer "Gauleiter" - is limitless range of possibilities:
- Reading and rayting texts;
- Three-speed remembering digits;
- Duing technological calculations;
- Heving powerful peripherals (tyaptery, lyaptery, maker,
Worker, Putter, teykery, andestendery and dizandestendery);
- Hellouing user's native language;
- Biing always Redi.
FIRM Cook G.m.b.H. " provides service free of their clients:
- Tiching staff based on mutual
Feeling;
- Dancing under the "Modern Talking".
Market prices of government, but the state of market
(45 thousand rubles).. To wholesalers discount (three clients
to 15 thousand rubles. or two clients to 22,5 thousand rubles).
"Gauleiter" - THIS IS YOUR Tomorrow TUDEY!
Private Studio Adam and Chaya "adapts
Computer "Gauleiter" for your needs:
- Output from right to left
- Cutting wire
- Monitor face to the wall.
KOSHER GUARANTEED!
Attention of heads of monasteries, parishes and Temple!
Assistance in the writings of your grave on the automation
of origin
Religious Needs you will have a computer "lord":
■ Catholic ■ build direct access to Christ's bosom
■ ■ turbokirillitsa in the post - powered by batteries
■ preserve the secrecy of confession with the conclusion of
a wide printer
■ Life of Christ, version 3.30
■ Operational porch, expandable to 8 KiloNischih
Basic configuration:
■ censer and sokadilo, 12 Megahertz
■ altar superVGA
■ two-slit type circle "on the restoration of the temple"
■ non-removable hard cross
■ round printer for Easter eggs
PRICES LOWER THAN IN THE WORLD! Our faith - your money!
-------------------------------------------------- -------------
(R) IRONMAN
COLLECTION OF STATEMENTS OF SOVIET OFFICERS
Textbook for junior and middle
academic staff.
"The citizen does not need fools.
So here I am. "
Unknown ensign.
330. N fly airplanes, not enough N - K, and two
rocket-propelled ...
331. Military secrecy is not that you learn, and that this
learn is you.
332. You are students or where? You are in service or who?
333. At the command of "Run-march hand sginayutsya knees!
334. C such boys, the future warrior, our girls can
sleep!
335. Take care of home, your mother!
336. Bush - a collection of twigs and leaves sticking out of one
place.
337. Tak light that just could not breathe.
338. Tozhe me defender of the motherland! In the trenches is
not sitting, and to engage in tions speak.
339. Landmark: a landmark first pine with a birch top.
340. C you nice to talk to when you say something.
341. Call me urgently to the authorities. Well I have a tail
pipe and a
General.
342. To the next lesson, all young men were shaved from the top
bottom!
343. Ivanov went through the anus and left.
344. Platoon, today Saturday. Explains the problem: to collect
all kir Peachey and burn.
345. What are you? While I was where?
346. Tishe, and then the tea cools.
347. Bullet - a fool, and you - fool. Sorry for the harshness,
but it is Sha duty.
348. You run with military training, like rats from a sinking
Korab la!
349. If you do not zavvtra podstrizhetes, I will punish you
today!
-------------------------------------------------- -------------
(C) RINDEX
And finally, an anecdote.
Sits near the Chukchi plague and crying. Passes by a
geologist and ask the Chukchi:
- Hey, Chukchi. What are you crying?
- Why, father savsem ball, but suffers. Kill him, I zap
Lacu.
- Ten skins and father kranty.
Chukchi gave geological ten skins. Geologist rolled up his
sleeves, went the tent and after a minute out, adjusting his
sleeve, and said:
- Well that's all. If something else is necessary - and say it.
A day later comes the brother Chukchi. And his brother -
rack 3 to 4. See Chukchi sits near the plague and crying.
- What do you cry brother?
- Why, father, pity, however. Geologist killed him, though.
- Well if you take a geologist Mimi would call him a tent. I
agree with him 'll deal.
Again, the geologist is Mimi plague. And again Chukchi
crying.
- What are you doing again noesh?
- Why, brother, ball, however. Groans.
- Come trodtsat skins, I told him ease the suffering.
Chukchi gave thirty skins. Geologist enters the tent. Thirty
minutes tent came running ... And then comes a tired geologist,
adjusts the sleeves, and said:
- Yes. And your brother to live and live for it ...
ADVERTISING.
(C) CDS SOFT
Call ...
Sale ZX-SPECTRUM 48k + controller + TR-DOS 5.03 + embedded
Power Supply (+5 V and +12 V). Price is negotiable.
Tel. 946-2398 Eugene, call between 21.00 and 23.00.
Sale 13th drive in working condition. Cheap!
Tel. 554-1582 Alex, calling from 14.00 to 22.00 daily.
Interested in all information on the printer ROBOTRON 6312.
Tel. 344-7762 Michael calls from 20.O0 to 22.00, daily.
Seeking for an exchange program for a computer ATM-Turbo
2 +.
Tel. 344-7762 Michael, calling from 20.00 to 22.00 daily.
I have two 13-s drive for three rubles
Tel. 409-9029 Alexander, calling from 13.00 to 21.00 daily.
For sale-6312 printer (radium), drive-13 and
Head of TEAC'a. All working. Tel.499-3117 Ilya.
Sale prefix "Kanga" 8-bit + full set of wires +
4 cartridges with a bunch of games: DIZZY: Fantastic
adventure,
BIGNOISE FREAKS OUT, PRINCE OF PERSIA and many others.
Price 200 TR Bargain.
Tel. 168-5705 Dimitri calls from 19.00 to 23.00 daily.
Buy AY-MOUSE to the wiring.
Tel. 395-8162 Alexander, calling from 12.00 to 22.00 daily
I sell and collect custom phones AONom! RUSS-22C + "
At preobretenny my phone given 2 YEAR WARRANTY!
The cost of the phone AONom - 225 TR The term of the assembly
3-7 days
And also carry out:
- Repair any type AONov
- Replacement of the software versions on the latest
- Memory expansion up to 256 rooms
- Installation of voice boards for 1 min. and 4 min.
- Installation SPEAKERPHONa
QUALITY GUARANTEED!
Phone: 496-61-59 Igor from 12.00 to 23.00.
Change COMMADORE-64 + drive on any 128k + spektrum drive.
Tel. 554-1582, from 14.00 to 22.00 daily.
Sale SCORPION-256K + monitor 32 WTC 202 + MS5350 + drive wheels.
Price 900 TR (Bargain).
Tel. 256-3370 Andrew from 19.00 to 22.00, from Monday to
Friday
SELL!
--- PENTAGON - 128K (see below)
--- B / C MONITIR B / P Rodney (see below)
--- Two drives "TEAC" 1.2M
--- CDOS-MODEM
--- AY-MOUSE
--- AY-8910
--- Kempston Joystick (see below)
--- Two speakers (stereo)
--- PRINTER ML-6312 (see below)
--- LOT DRIVES
--- LITERATURE
--- TWO SPECTRUMA - 48K (see below)
--- Two supervisors DRIVE (see below)
--- "Mother" 286 (see below)
+ * +
* FOR PENTAGON - 128K *
For him to set:
1. Additional memory 565RU5 - 16sht.
2. Replacement stickers on the keys (iron, pile)
3. For the case insert the keyboard - 2 pcs.
4. Spare KR1818VG93 - 1pc.
5. Different schemes
* MONITOR NOT WORKING *
For him to set:
1. Reserve Corps
2. Pipe dead
3. Board dead
Kempston * NAVIGATION *
Made of the joystick from DENDY (though it is a bit
incomplete)
* PRINTER MS 6312 *
In working condition, but without the loop
(From the board to 'head')
For him to set:
1. Controller board dead
2. Stack of papers
Also available:
SPECTRUM'y 48K in an unknown state
Disk controllers in an unknown state
"Mother" 286 for free if needed
+ * +
Price: negotiable
Call: 387-07-63 Dmitri, in the evening
C R O W N O buy a printer MS6313 (6312).
Tel. 554-1582 (Alex), calling from 14.00 to 22.00 daily.
Marketplace ROM 27128, with Firmware "Sinclair 1982". At a
reasonable price
Tel. 315-3315 (Mike), calling from 16.00 to 20.00, with
Mon-Sat
Industrial and commercial center
"Computers for the public"
invites you to visit the Polytechnic Museum!
Dear owners of ZX-Spectrum! If you need the most but
curves are not very new and just needed programs, and
only on Saturdays and Sundays, and midweek -
come to us. Here you will find a variety of thematic
Kie, games and music collection at a price of 6000 rubles, and
system - to 8,500 rubles. The latest entry programs
from around the world average of 8500 to 10000 rubles. Also
Here you will find the most diverse literature on the ZX
Spectrum. And, of course, themselves computers, modems, etc.
Possible replacement of the Kvant-BC (48K) at the Grand GRM 2
+ (128K)
with an additional charge. Come to us! Our address: Moscow,
New Plo schad, the building of the Polytechnic Museum. Floppy
disks, literature,
modems are sold at a kiosk in the lobby of the museum (next
to the cascade soi); time from 11 to 16 hours, a break from
14.00 to 14.45
Computers and the rest is sold on 3-4 floors in the Division
le Computer Science; there are classroom
and a free game room.
We are open daily, except Mondays and the last
Thursday of each month, from 11 to 16 hours.
Our phone: 928-2138, from 11 to 16 hours.
P A S P O R A R A! ! !
Sold the radio station "Megajet 2701.
40 channels. Europe + Russia. 4 watts. AM + FM.
Price: $ 65, or 350 rubles. Apply only to business
proposals. The exchange offer is not considered!
Call from 18.00 to 21.30 daily Tel: 903-0347 Sergey
Assisted in the acquisition of any radio stations.
On any Range: 1 MHz to 144 MHz, a well as the matching
ing devices, power supplies and cables of 50 ohms. Carry
installation of antennas, boards of individual dial tone,
Beeper tone 1 and 8, zauzhaem bandwidth, we introduce
Russian grid. Install the radio in the car. Re
MONT.
Call from 20.00 to 00.00, tel: 287-0171 Valentin (Dora
ment of) or from 18.00 to 21.30, tel: 903-0347 Sergey (for
outliers)
Permission to install antennas desirable!
Resolution and the category at 144 MHz is required!
Sold phone AONom. Version of the "Russ - 20c".
Housing red bun. Price: 190 rubles.
Call from 18.00 to 21.30 daily Tel.: 903-0347 Sergey
For sale computer "Pentagon 128". Included:
Monitor Electronics 1932 WTC 202 "with a protective shield.
CDOS - modem. AY - mouse + pad + diskette with the programs.
Drive "Electronics 5313". 100 floppy disks with the
programs. A whole bunch of literature. Joystick: Sinclair 1-2.
Kempston No! Active speakers separately. Price: $ 35 (without
the company is not sold) Price: $ 200 (bargaining is
not appropriate!)
Call from 18.00 to 21.30 daily Tel: 903-0347 Sergey
For sale Monitor Electronics 1932 WTC 202.
Perfect condition. The picture does not spread.
Price: 400 rubles (To be discussed!)
Call from 18.00 to 21.30 daily Tel: 903-0347 Sergey
SELL!
PROFI + (512K)
Drive + 5.25 '(in housing)
+ PD pulse
+ Video-scanner (connected + software)
+ Modem (C-DOS)
+ Mouse (AY-MOUSE)
+ Akt.kolonki (stereo) mini speaker
+ Joystick (3 ports: kempston + sinclair1 + sinclair2)
+ 120 floppy disks with the best and most essential software
+ Much of the literature on SPECCY
All together: $ 140 or 750t.r.
CALL-TO AGREE!
(095) 524-01-43 (Dmitry) (17.00)
AND ALSO SELL:
body + Keyboard PROFI +
Call us - agree!
GENTLEMEN ADVERTISERS, TIMELY WAIVES the advertising, COH YES
you are in it no longer requires.
ADVERTISEMENTS PUBLEKUYUTSYA for FIVE ISSUES!
EPILOGUE
(C) RINDEX
That's it. The next issue will be released on Monday, when
again not there will be some difficulties. Bye, see you.
Editor in Chief - Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
Deputy Editor in Chief
- Alexander Eliseev / CDS SOFT / ... 395-8162
Partition Editor "Advertising", "List of BBS" and "Wanted"
- Alexander Eliseev / CDS SOFT / ... 395-8162
Editor, "News from DITRONIK 3 BBS"
- Little Russians Ilya / CYBORG / ... 409-4297
Editor-in "party!"
- Dmitry Sosenushkin / RAVER / ... 168-5705
Editor of the "Printed with the continuation"
- Pavel Fedin / API SOFTWARE / ... 329-4385
Editors section Razbiralka "
- Malyshev, Alexander / WARRIOR / ... 902-0113
- Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
Editors of the section "Continuous Fun"
- Skobtsov Alex / MASTER SOFT / ... 218-1448
- Alexander Titov / IRONMAN / ... 455-9089
- Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
Editor of the remaining sections
- Basargin Denis / RINDEX / ... 422-8627
For communication with computer paper "MAXIMUM" You can leave a
message on one of the BBS, oriented to receive material
for "MAXIMUM".
Or call the editor at:
422-8627 from 13.00 to 21.00 (Denis), except Saturdays and
Sundays,
or call an alternate phone:
395-8162, from 12.00 to 22.00 (Alexander), on a daily basis.
To advertise in the newspaper, "MAXIMUM" call:
395-8162, from 12.00 to 22.00 (Alexander), on a daily basis.
All changes in the servers, and for registering new
BBS, please call:
395-8162, from 12.00 to 22.00 (Alexander), on a daily basis.
To publicize the list of toys you wanted, download
this list is one of the BBS, which accept mail for our
newspapers, or call:
395-8162, from 12.00 to 22.00 (Alexander), on a daily basis.
NEWSPAPER "MAXIMUM" FREE distributed through the network BBS
MOSCOW. Commercial distribution is not prohibited, BUT
Is not encouraged.
RESPONSIBILITY FOR ADVERTISING ANY ADVERTISERS!
ANY USE OF CERTAIN MATERIALS ONLY WITH PERMISSION
AUTHORS!
Reprinting of materials, reference to EDITORS REQUIRED!
The newspaper is published from 9/6/1996.
Other articles:
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solid jokes - watch commander.
Collection of statements by Soviet officers (continued).
Anecdote about the Chukchi and geologist.
Advertising - Advertisements and announcements ...
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